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When attorneys attack June 25, 2009

Posted by markgeil in Things that amuse me.

Here are a couple of inane product warnings I’ve read recently.

These were on my new guitar:

The instrument can catch fire, and earthquakes can cause it to fall if stored in a high location.

Earthquakes? The word is even plural. They expect multiple earthquakes during times I’m not playing my guitar. And if that’s not scary enough, there was this:

Read the owner’s manual that came with power amplifiers that you connect your guitar to. Accidents such as fire or electric shock can occur due to lightning strikes.

So, while the guitar is not being played, the earthquakes (plural) come, but while I’m playing I can expect lightning raining down from the heavens.

Either Yamaha knows something I don’t about the coming apocalypse, or they need to relax a little more.

And finally, there was this allergy warning, on one of those tiny bags of peanuts that a select few airlines still give you:

This product manufactured in a facility that processes peanuts.

Did I mention this was a bag of peanuts? If the person with the peanut allergy is dumb enough to eat a bag of peanuts because it didn’t have a warning label stating that those peanuts might have been around traces of other peanuts, then I say he deserves his fate.



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